 It’s been almost 2 years since I got the email on my phone, alerting me that my “DNA results are in!” I was on the outside of this whole movement, until then. I didn’t realize I was putting a shovel to the soil to find something long buried. I was like many people who had never questioned my identity. I was secure in the family that had been assigned to me by my parents, and the names given to me. Like some people, I maybe cracked jokes, too, about the people who got DNA surprises. But I hope I didn’t laugh long at them, because similar jokes have since been like tiny jabs in my heart, over and over again. I cringe that I didn’t know, nor did I understand. And still, so many people, everywhere, don’t understand. It’s just not on their radar.
3/31/2021
 Sometimes God draws our attentions to things subtly, and we may miss what He’s pointing out. Less often He highlights things profoundly. We may notice things in a starting way that we never noticed them before. Two summers ago I was visiting family and friends in another state, driving long-familiar roads, planning the day in my head. Then a house popped out at me. It was hidden behind the ancient, bowing branches of several long ago planted coniferous trees. The house was sunshine yellow with forest green shutters, and it’s existence clearly spanned at least one century. I had never noticed this house, not in over 50 years of bypasses. But that day, it intrigued me and drew me. It was regal and warm and inviting. Driving on the way back, I passed it again, but this time I noticed that a “For Sale” sign hung from a post in front of the yard. That gorgeous property is long sold now, over two years later. In the days following its discovery from behind the sentry evergreens that obscured its existence, God showed us that it was time for our family to move. That house piqued my curiosity and led to a routine perusal of online real estate in that quiet corner of a tiny New England state. In the days after that visit, it seemed that my husband’s hair took on a new silvery-white iridescence in the sun, and the majority of my adult kids all hankered to move out and discover the world on their own. Our beloved, and I mean truly loved, home, seemed cavernous. It echoed now when our dogs barked and I found myself making way too much supper on many nights. Our lives were shifting. But this all seemed premature to my personal timetable. In so many ways, our lives were really good. The thing was, and still is, that we had weighed the cost of living in the highest-taxed state over two decades ago, and had found it worth the price. Phooey on the New Jersey stereotypes! God had carved a sanctuary for us in the north central part of this hidden treasure state and we had firmly planted our family flag. We believed that we had the best of most things: the best schools, the best doctors, the best church, the best neighbors, the best friends. Our yard displayed the four seasons so awe-strikingly that our phone cameras contain years of landscape shots. The postcard views from our windows never seemed enough to gaze and appreciate for the moment. Why would we ever leave our haven? God knew we needed that much time to let go. It would take God alone to spatula us out of this source of blessings and memories. And that He did. But He was gracious enough to do it over the span of two years, because He knew we needed that much time to let go of so many of over 30 years of possessions, to slowly release the loving hands of friends that held ours, and to fully trust that He would not drop us and see us shatter all over a new and unfamiliar floor. Our tendency as people is to hold on to the good things that we have. People have actually made businesses out of producing beautiful calligraphic signs that say “Blessed” and we buy them and secure them to our walls. For some they mean “Content” and for some they mean “Thankful” and for others they mean “Our hearts are full.” I never had that interior decor on my wall, but we could have. As I felt the strengthening pull to let go of all we love, I felt God ask me a question one quiet moment. He said “I have blessed you with comfort and met your needs over and above. Does that mean you won’t go and do what I’m asking you to now do?” We decided to open our eyes to the hard things about our lives there in the fast-paced, competitive, expensive place that we called home. Yes, it had been stressful, every month in fact, to meet our financial obligations. For years I had decreed “My God will meet my every need according to His riches in glory…even if I live in New Jersey!” But we wrestled with financial stress for a reason. If you live in another region of our great country, our expenses may strike you as comparatively shocking. One living here, though, becomes numb to them and moving just seems such a drastic step. Because it is. So, many of us don’t. Unless God intervenes. We sorted, and made about a thousand trips to the Salvation Army donation center. We tossed abandoned but stored toys that got dirtier somehow by sitting in plastic bins. We boxed books and tried to pass them on to places where they’d actually be read. In the meanwhile, in that time, I helped downsize my elderly mom’s house, had surgery, recovered, weathered our state’s unprecedented struggle with the darkest days of covid, and nearly two years passed. Gaining long-ebbed physical strength one day (months after surgery), taking a walk on my favorite county path (yet another benefit of our high tax dollars), I noticed a turtle splayed on the side of the road. “This is what happens when you transition too slowly.” I have rescued turtles over time. They move way too slowly across roads and paths, unable to transition safely, unaware of speeding cars, and in this case, tall and unyielding horses that frequent the unpaved trail. I gingerly pick the little fellows up and carefully lower them on the other side of the road. I hadn’t been there in time for this smashed turtle. He was long gone. His crossing over failed. As his tragic ending registered in my dismayed and sympathetic mind, the Holy Spirit put words in my mind; “This is what happens when you transition too slowly. This could happen to you.” Wanting God’s best, and yielding to His highly effective overall message, my procrastination smashed, I called the realtor the next day. I didn’t ask to have the kind of life where we have several major moves in the course of our kids’ upbringing. But we actually have a realtor, and she had just emerged from covid inactivity two weeks earlier. In her words, after that call, we did in 3 or 4 weeks what it takes most people to do in 3 or 4 months. We pushed, and by God’s grace, our house was on the market in less than a month. I now had a sense of urgency. No one saw it coming. But it came, "The New York City Exodus" washed over our region, and God had prepared us. Eight days later, a few days after a storm that took away our electricity for the better part of a week, with our partial-house generator raising a ruckus, our property strewn with wind torn branches, and our feeling discombobulated and less than ready, we sold our house on the second showing. We had ridden a wave that we didn’t see coming. No one saw it coming. But it came. The New York City Exodus, the papers and websites now call it, washed over our region and God had prepared us, guided us, and told us to be ready. I have several friends, and they have several friends, and so on and so on, who have made similar moves in these last weeks. Some of us got two years to transition. Others got a few months. Some got less. Interestingly, no one I know is fleeing. We all feel beckoned, to other places for reasons known, and some unknown. We all are letting go of seasons well lived and so appreciated. We got to live where we did and it was awesome! We’re so grateful. We now have our feet on the ground of that tiny state, a new place to call home. Everything from condiments to the snow blower has been moved. The dust hasn’t yet settled. But we made the crossing, and we are ready for all that God has for us here. We are so thankful! We aren’t the only ones who moved here in this season, so we are in a temporary situation and are waiting for our next home to come on the market. As we meet new people and reconnect with old friends, we think of Abraham and how he trusted God’s vague but sky-stretching promises. That big question “Why?” may have a few answers that only amount to a reason if grouped together. But we all admit that the sheer chaos of the Year 2020 has left us too humble and helpless to predict what the future holds. But God knows. He knew years ago and gently and patiently positioned us to ride a huge wave. Our trust is in Him. “Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, ‘This is the way; walk in it.’”-Isaiah 30:21 10/13/2020
 In recent months our family persevered through some major transitions. Looking back, I’m sure that God kept sighing. “If she only would trust me. If she would just let go of the reigns, she’d find peace.” And on and on with His infinite patience. It was a trial for me. I look back now and agree with God. I should have just trusted Him. It’s a lesson I keep getting sent back to me to learn, like a spelling test retake, on a huge-er (more huge) level.
5/4/2020
 Joy to the world, The Lord has come! We are the people of faith and this is our holiday anthem. Except the Lord, well, not all of us have connected with Him recently. Full plates, you know how it is. He certainly knows, too. Jesus gets it, we reason. Obligations are unavoidable, responsibilities hover and our focus is on doing it all the best we can. Joy to the world? Doesn’t seem that way as we clamor to do life well.
12/16/2019
 LIFE / DAILY
There are people who are the last to board trend trains, and I admit I’m one of them. We’re last to get smart phones, last to begin using texts, late in the trend to have our DNA done. A friend posted her DNA over a year ago on social media and I rolled my eyes. It held no attraction to me. 8/26/2019
 Holiday shopping is a great time to remember that Jesus said, “I am sending you out like sheep among wolves. Therefore be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves.” (Matthew 10:16). My daughter was just the almost-victim of fraud as she found a “great” apartment online. It was, in fact, too good to be true. Because of God’s grace, and her typographically-trained designer eye, she detected that a verification document sent by the “renter” was photoshopped. Yes, people are out there to steal our money sometimes. 11/22/2017
 Were you overwhelmed when you realized that the holidays effectively snuck up on you this year? We all know someone who already has their Christmas shopping done and their Christmas card address labels printed in order to mail their cards the day after Christmas. But most of us are bracing as we start the holiday juggle. Exactly how much can we successfully accomplish before the holidays run their course, yet another year? 11/12/2017
 He gripped the worn pencil with his gnarled but steady hand. With determination, he pushed through his hesitance and formed the curving first letter of his name. He paused between strokes, as if exerting great physical effort. All three letters completed, he assessed his work. “Sam” was displayed on the lined wide ruled paper, letters uneven and light, but clear and certain. He looked up, gray, full eyebrows raised in an unspoken question. “Awesome!” I smiled back. In relief, he dropped his pencil, leaned back in the kitchen chair, and exhaled. 9/30/2017
 I grew up in New England where historic little churches still stand in the center of some towns. They are situated on picturesque grassy commons, surrounded by rolling hills and red maple and white oak trees. As young students, we visited these lonely and stark structures on field trips. We were told horror stories of how colonial children would sit for hours at a time, straight backed and paying attention, every Sunday morning, through summer heat and winter frost. 9/24/2017
 She was angry and felt rejected, and she shared bits and pieces of conversations that she had. These conversations had been held, never believing that confidential moments would be publicly aired. But they were being aired now. “He said this, and I said that….” Those sentences, spoken freely months ago, were now pinned up for inspection, criticism and judgement. My friend had broken up with her boyfriend. The last time I had seen someone so passionately plead their case was after a family had left a church, feeling misunderstood and insignificant. Hurt and offended, they spoke, believing they needed to be heard and understood. In both cases, mutual respect had been thrown to the wind. 7/31/2017
 We planned on visiting relatives, anticipating snug and sardine-like accommodations. We were undaunted, as always, by our impending stay and a few mildly inconvenient days because the trade-off was awesome. Our hosts, however, had other ideas about our visit. We were welcomed with news regarding our sleeping arrangements. Surprise! We would be staying in a camper! They had purchased a used one, parked down the winding country road, back in the woods. I don’t like camping, at all. 7/14/2017
 *Ping!* It was a instantaneous, subtle, but very negative reaction to my friend’s mention of another person’s name. The other person was a sister in the Lord, and I hadn’t seen her for a couple of years. I was tempted to roll my eyes, or say something unkind. Instead I stuffed the unpleasant memories that began to surface and moved on in the conversation. 7/4/2017
 Are you completely healed, body, soul and spirit? If so, praise God! If not, then you're like most of us, somewhere along in the process of becoming whole. Many times we aren’t aware of the work that God still is doing in us. Life will be moving along smoothly, then something from nowhere hits us hard. 5/30/2017
 I think it’s safe to say that we can’t appreciate one another’s positions, perspectives and experiences in life. We’re an educated people, and I’m sorry to say, we can be superior about our knowledge. Even without intention, we observe one another’s lives, and we judge. As we assess and evaluate everything around us, we also sometimes reject. We reject ideas, opportunities and theologies, and a lot more. We also reject one another. 5/27/2017
 Has God ever told you to do something big, and then as you moved ahead to do it, opposition rose up? Some people take this as a sign that they have heard wrong, made a mistake, or just become warn out from pushing ahead. Scripture actually tells us that we will find ourselves in rough spots. There are no promises of smooth sailing, day after day, for a lifetime 5/25/2017
 I know a lady who, clad in designer clothes and donning a high end hairdo, will enter any room and scatter its occupants. This sounds harsh, but she personifies the words grumpy and mean, and anyone who knows her knows that she views them as inferior, inadequate, or both. It never occurs to her that she’s who nobody wants to grow up to be. 5/18/2017
 As we grow spiritually, God sometimes allows harder situations and longer waits in order stretch us and build our faith. We don’t always see it that way, however. Condemnation, doubt and discouragement hover around us, and we sometimes believe the lies that we’ve messed up and missed our chance, that we aren’t good enough, and sometimes even question if God is faithful. Don’t bury your head and give up! Instead, fight! Wield the weapons that God has placed in our armory. Victory will come. Here are some ways to defeat doubt and even the deepest discouragement. 5/17/2017
 I had poured a lot into our group, and it had grown so that I could no longer keep tabs on all of its members. This is the point at which God moved our family. We left with a large, framed heart, a beautiful gift from the group. It’s was matted with a thick white border that was covered with dozens of handwritten notes and blessings, signed with Sharpies. It still hangs in our library, and I absolutely can’t glance at it without a whimsical smile, and a prayer for the group that still continues to this day. 5/12/2017
 When we were kids we didn’t know the names for the dysfunctions that were evident in the homes of those we knew and loved. Relatives, neighbors and friends seemed to each have their own unique issues in their homes. We accepted them as part of life, tiptoeing when necessary, jumping through hoops to keep peace, or avoiding them altogether. I had a truly unique situation. My best friend seemed to be from the most truly “functional” family I had ever witnessed. Her family was a sharp contrast to my own. 5/10/2017
 The thermometer and news everywhere in the city told us that it was double-digit below zero. Still, I needed groceries, and I had an infant and a toddler to bring with me wherever I went. As I pulled into the nearly-empty parking lot of the grocery store, powdery snow fell against the dark afternoon sky, giving the impression of oppressive fog. 5/9/2017
 I got'ta hand it to my little guy. He’s had health issues since he was a toddler. Lots of doctors never diagnosed his condition. The most obvious issue, of many, has been his weight, which reached a crisis proportion this last year. Obesity is hard, and it’s harder in a world that judges, criticizes and mocks the person struggling with it. It’s even harder when you’re just a little kid. 5/1/2017
 God has a habit of picking the least likely candidates for kingdom exploits. Sometimes it is hard to imagine a less suitable pick - especially when it is us. Getting past who we know ourselves to be, can be the greatest challenge and the most formidable threat to our destiny. 4/28/2017
 My desk piles up as quickly as the bins at the post office. This is because of five kids at various stages of life and school and jobs, household responsibilities, things to read before throwing out, things to file, things to mail. Decluttering experts have a lot to say about preventing such piles. I’ve read lots of these books and articles. Little of it has helped me. Even today, my desk needs tackling, big time. 4/11/2017
 One day I decided to participate in the social media phenomenon. That day my eyes were opened to the fact that it was true, my moves were being recorded. We all see the cameras hanging from traffic lights, so this should have been no surprise, but what I didn’t understand was that any minute of every day, my keystrokes were sending computers everywhere very personal information about me. 3/29/2017
 You probably take your refrigerator for granted. Nothing personal. The fact is that unless you’ve grown up without electricity or have no access to cool storage, you probably grab the milk and jam without a second thought. I don’t. Anymore. Our custom fridge, designed to blend with the caramel woodgrain of our country cabinets, stopped working months ago and stands empty in our lovely, relentlessly-occupied kitchen. 3/24/2017 |